Entries from December 2009 ↓

Todays No Joke: Afghan Problem Solved

New Military Unit
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The Pentagon announced today the formation of a new 500-man elite fighting unit called the United States Redneck Special Forces (USRSF).

These boys will be dropped off in Afghanistan and have been given only the following facts about terrorists:

1. The season opened today.

2. There is no limit.

3. They taste just like chicken.

4. They don’t like beer, pickups, country music or Jesus.

5. They are directly responsible for the death of Dale Earnhardt .

The Pentagon expects the problems in Afghanistan to be over by NEXT Friday.

Todays Joke: Catholic Priest, Nun, Golf

A Catholic priest and a nun were taking a rare afternoon off
and enjoying a round of golf.


The priest stepped up to the first tee and took a mighty swing.
He missed the ball entirely and said “Shit, I missed.”

The good Sister told him to watch his language.

On his next swing, he missed again. “Shit, I missed.”

“Father, I’m not going to play with you if you keep swearing,”
the nun said tartly..

The priest promised to do better and the round continued.

On the 4th tee, he misses again. The usual comment followed.

Sister is really mad now and says, “Father John, God is going to
strike you dead if you keep swearing like that.”

On the next tee, Father John swings and misses again.
“Shit, I missed.”

A terrible rumble is heard and a gigantic bolt of lightning comes
out of the sky and strikes Sister Marie dead in her tracks.

And from the sky comes a booming voice ……


“Shit, I missed.”

Todays Joke: New #1 on PGA Tour Reported by Fox News and CNN

Fox News and CNN have reported that Elin Nordegren Woods moved to the top of the money list on the PGA Tour yesterday after “beating” the world’s number one golfer. The news came after the world’s number one golfer inadvertently played the wrong hole..